Some recent happenings

I'm at my parent's again and thus I will write a short blog entry. I hope your Christmases have all gone well. Kellen and Jen are due to arrive in a few hours and will stay through the new year. My Christmas was pretty good. We didn't do anything too special because we're waiting on the aforementioned Kellen and Jen (is that one word or too?). We just hung out and ate food. All in all, a good day. Sunday was really cool though. I went skeet shooting with some friends from church. It was my first time shooting a shot gun. I did pretty good for my first time though. I hit probably six out of twenty-five. I definitely feel more like a man now. I think I might need to go out and get me a shotgun now. It was really fun. Anyway, I need to get going. My aunt, grandma, and cousin are here and we are about to watch Christmas in Connecticut. Mind you, this is not the old version. This is the new version with Dyan Cannon and Kris Kristofferson. I'll leave it at that :)

Hey everybody!

I'm back. I haven't died or anything, but my computer did. At least that's my excuse for not posting any time recently. I can turn it on, but the keyboard and touchpad don't work. I just sent it back to the manufacturer yesterday, so hopefully I'll get it back soon and working. There have been a lot of things going on recently. I'm in the middle of planning a missions conference for May 13th. My work schedule changed recently and I'm now working 6:00 am to 2:30 pm. I don't like getting up so early, but I do like my afternoons. I also turn 23 tomorrow. In fact, as I write this I'm at my parents house and we're going to have a family thing tonight because I'm pretty busy the next two nights. I'm not too big on my birthday. I don't like to make a big deal out of it or have a big party or anything. I would like to think that it's because I'm just a really humble guy and I don't like being the center of attention. But I know that isn't the case. So I don't really know why I don't make a big deal out of it. Or perhaps that's what I'm doing right now? The world may never know. Kellen and Jen are also coming to visit over New Years. So we are going to celebrate Christmas then with them. I figure the day doesn't really matter as long as you're celebrating it with family. I'm really excited for that.

Is it just me, or does anyone else feel convicted for focusing on Christ's birth mainly during this time of the year? It just seems like I don't think about the incarnation more during the rest of the year. The incarnation is inextricably linked with Christ's oblation and should be as much of a focus for us as the cross is, but yet I don't think much about it until I come across those passages that talk about the incarnation and, of course, Christmas time.

Anyway, I better get going. Merry Christmas to everyone and may the glory of Christ be on all your minds and in all your hearts. And may you all have a great holiday season.

Beta

As you can tell, I've decided to switch to the new blogger beta. I like the customizability (that's not a word, is it?). I also started a new blog titled In season and out of season at letusreturn.blogspot.com. I didn't really mean to, it just kind of happened when I was trying to switch over from old blogger to new. I don't really know if I'm going to keep it going (I kind of doubt I will since I can't update this blog regularly). Anyway, let me know what you guys think.

Check this out

You have to watch this video. It's of a guy named Trace Bundy, who is an absolutely amazing guitarist. I've known about him for a while, but I just watched some of his stuff on youtube. It's incredible. You have to see it to believe it. Check out some of his other stuff while you're there. You won't be disappointed.

Kellen and Jen's visit

It was great having Kellen and Jen down to visit for the weekend. Kellen and I spent pretty much the entire time just hanging out and talking, we even caught a movie (The Prestige, pretty dark and disturbing). Jen got in some much needed shopping (Salmon, ID doesn't have too much to offer. Not even a Wal-mart [gasp!]). And we just spent a lot of time together as a family. It felt kind of like Christmas or Thanksgiving having the whole family descend on my parents' house like that. Anyway, I got some good pictures (can you tell I like my new camara)

This is my sisters and their husbands and a couple that are really good friends with Kellen and Jen

These are my sisters. Keri on the left and Jen on the right

Here are my brothers-in-law with my sisters. Kellen is on the left and Eric on the right.

And this is the updated family picture. From left - my dad and mom, Kellen, Jen, me, Keri, and Eric.

And this one is Kellen playing my guitar. Both he and Eric are far better guitarists than I am.

Anyway, that was my weekend. I thought about posting a picture with my ankle wrapped in ice (my football injury) also, but I thought better about it. Perhaps a little too graphic ;-) You'll all thank me later.

Some more pictures

I am including these for the orographically challenged.

This is the east side of the Wasatch range

This is the view from the valley where my parents live

This is Snowbasin ski resort. My brother-in-law, Eric, works up there.

This is the same range and resort from the road over the mountains

This is Weber Canyon. I have to drive through this to get to my parents'

And the Lord makes them tremble at the sound of His voice. What a great and awesome God we serve. I think that's why He gave us mountains. So that we could see how much bigger than us God is and how much more powerful.

A random thought

I left the tv on while I took a shower and attempted to recover from football, and The Wizard of Oz came on. And I had an interesting thought. Wouldn't walking around in ruby shoes really hurt. There wouldn't be any flex, probably no arch support, and absolutely no cushioning. Why would anyone want to wear them. And why didn't the wicked witch of the east ever use the shoes? I'm beginning to get quite skeptical of the whole situation.

I have some pictures forthcoming and I hope to post them soon.

Kellen and Jen

are coming down for the weekend!!! I'm really excited. It's also great because they'll get in tonight and I have tomorrow off for Veterans' day. So I can spend the entire weekend with them. Totally looking forward to it. It'll be really good to see them again.

In other unrelated news: I have found that the best thing to listen to on the way home from work and at home is Blues and/or Cool Jazz. I listened to some B.B King on the way home and I'm listening to Miles Davis, Kind of Blue, right now. Very relaxing. I highly recommend it. Any other suggestions for wind-down music? I also like classical, but I'm not too well versed in the different composers.

Well, gotta go. Plenty of things to do. God bless.

A view from my parent's house

Just getting the whole posting pictures to your blog thing figured out

This is the view from my parent's house in Huntsville

Unfortunately, I didn't get any mountains in the picture, but I'm sure I'll be posting some of those as well.

Vote

This is a great article by Piper on why we should vote, even if the candidates aren't great. I don't yet know who I am going to vote for tomorrow, but I am going to vote. I'm not voting ignorantly either. I'll know who and why before I actually do.

Friday

I put a guy in jail. I don't want to get into the long version, but I saw a guy hit his wife and I called the police. He was in jail last night. I don't know where he is now, if he's still in there, if he's out, or what. Pray for him and his family. Pray that they might see their need for Christ through this.

Basketball season

has begun. I just might start rooting for the Bulls too. Which is something I never thought I would do. But they played really good team ball and good defense - yes, Micah, defense. They passed the ball a lot and played really unselfishly. It was just to watch. Or maybe it was the fact that they laid the hammer down on the Heat. That was pretty cool. Dewayne Wade is pretty cool, but I can no longer root for Shaq. I liked him when he was on the Lakers, but ever since he left, I can't stand him. Or perhaps I should say I tolerated him?

And for dinner tonight, I actually ate a salad without my mom making it for me. Albeit, the lettuce was bagged and not a whole head. And a salad by my definition consists of lettuce, olives, cheese, and dressing. I don't like all the other vegetables that most people put on salads. I guess that kind of diminishes the quality, but I'm making strides.

Go Lakers!

Ephesians 2:8

Have you ever noticed the first word of Ephesians 2:8? I was just reading over it and it really struck me and I had to share it with you. It starts out with the word "For." This means that there is a direct connection with the verses before it. And this struck me as a little odd. The verses beforehand talk about how Christ saved us when we were dead and how we now receive this immeasureable gift from Him. And so the question came to my mind, why does Paul go from talking about the immeasurable riches of His grace and then jump into the means of our salvation? I think the reason why Paul does this is because we can't receive these riches if our salvation had anything to do with us. In other words, if we had anything to do with our own salvation then we would be ineligible for the riches of His grace. I know that this isn't something new, but it just really struck me and jumped out at me. How awesome is our God! How rich is His love for us! It just blows my mind.

Quick Update

I don't really know what I want to talk about. I just wanted to update the blog. Kind of sad, huh? I guess there just isn't much going on in the old brain. Actually, there has been a lot of stuff going on recently, I just don't really want to blog about it. But I do want to post something on Psalm 18 soon. I've really been impacted by it and how it is an amazing statement of the sufficiency of Christ. And speaking of the Psalms, I love 4:7 - "You have put more joy in my heart than they have when their grain and wine abound." We do indeed have a greater source of joy than the world could ever imagine. And yet how often do I turn away from God and toward the world to find my joy? This is a great verse to hold on to, at least for me. It helps me remember the source of my greatest joy and that it is far better than anything the world can offer.

Down and Out

Lately I've been feeling pretty run down. I think I have some bug that's been going around. It's kind of a flu/cold bug. The lack of heat in my house probably hasn't helped matters either. I don't think I've been hit too hard with it, but it just won't go away. So today, I left work really early and have just hung out at my house for the most part. Which turned out to be a very good thing. I got online around 3:00 today (during which I would normally be working) and when I went to change the site address I accidentally hit the MSN messenger icon at the top of the screen. I decided to sign in just for the heck of it and by God's providence John, the Lebonese missionary my church supports, was online at the same time. We ended up chatting for about 30 minutes before he had to go to bed (it was 1 am his time). It was a really good conversation. It was good to connect with him and see how he was doing over there. We struck up a friendship when he was here in August and his example has been really encouraging for me. He is a year younger than I am and he has lived in Lebanon for three years. If the Lord wills, I want to go over there for a few weeks in May and evangelize and help him. Keep him in your prayers because it is a volitile situation over there. It even appears that Hamas tried to abduct him last week. He is also on his own much of the time that he is evangelizing and he could use some help and encouragement along the way. It is amazing though to see the work that God is doing through him. More and more people are coming to know Christ over there, including former muslims. It truly is amazing. God is indeed a sovereign God and He will build His kingdom in even the most spiritually inhospitable areas.

No Heat

I don't have heat in my house. The heater is broken. And the weather just turned cold so it is about freezing in the morning. My friends (the landlords) called to get somebody out here to figure out what's wrong with it, but that won't happen for another week. And to add to the chill, I have a bunch of big windows that apparently aren't very well insulated. I think I might have to start drinking hot beverages. But I draw the line at coffee. I'll drink tea and hot chocolate and maybe other things that are hot, but not coffee. I'm not that desperate...yet.

On a better note, I led my first missions committee meeting the other day. It went really well and we're trying to get some things going and start donating more money. I'm also going to try to organize an annual or semi-annual missions conference and a monthly missions prayer meeting. If the Lord wills, this will all get off the ground and I could be really busy in the near future. But I'll have to wait and see what He does.

Success

"Success...was the only god the entire world served."

A line from the beginning of Elizabethtown. All too true, especially in America. Unfortunately, it also seems to be partly true of the church as well. The church today listens to the voice of pragmatism and "what works" instead of the voice of God that declares "I will build my church" and "I am the source of its growth." Success is how the world determines what is good. What is good, what is of God, is how the Christian determines success. Until the church throws off its ties to the world and its adultery with its ideals, we will continue to flounder in lukewarm theology and lives. We must return to God like the Gomer we are if we do not wish to be spit out and become a dead and barren land.

Psalm 1

I'll apoligize in advance for the length. I couldn't help myself. I've just been really impacted and convicted by this psalm recently.

Psalm 1
“Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers. The wicked are not so, but are like chaff that the wind drives away. Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous; for the LORD knows the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked will perish.”

In this Psalm we see a description of the righteous and of the wicked. I think that the first thing to note is the fact that there is no middle ground represented in this psalm. You are either a wicked man or a righteous one. This dichotomy is demonstrated throughout scripture. We are either children of God or children of satan (John 8:44-47). We are either of the flock or not (John 10). We are either slaves to sin or slaves of righteousness (Romans 6). We either listen and follow or we don’t (John 10 and I John 4). Therefore, I think that we should pay very close attention to what this psalm is saying about these two classes of people.

The first thing we see is a description of the righteous man. He is blessed. And the reason that he is blessed is because of what he does and what he doesn’t do. He doesn’t walk in the counsel or the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of scoffers. Rather, in direct contrast, he delights in the law of the LORD and meditates upon it day and night. Here we see another dichotomy. Delighting in and meditating on the word are contrasted with walking in the counsel of the wicked, etc. In short we either listen to and love the word of God, or we heed the advice of the wicked. Again there is no middle ground. This is an incredibly important statement. We are told here that if we do not delight in the word of God and meditate on it constantly, then we are walking in the counsel of the wicked and are not blessed. If we are Christians, then we must love the word of God and seek to immerse our hearts and minds in it constantly. This is repeated multiple times in the New Testament as well. We are told in John 10 that if we are of God then we will listen to Jesus’ voice and follow it. This is repeated in I John 4. We must love to read the word of God. If we don’t then how can we claim that the Spirit of God dwells within us, and how can we claim any assurance of our salvation. God’s word is life to us and we must love it. It must be our delight, and if it is then we will desire to read it often and meditate upon it day and night.

If this is true of us, then the rest of the description of the righteous man will be true of us as well. The first thing that is said of us is that we will be like a tree planted by streams of water. This is contrasted with the wicked man who has no such stability, but is blown about by the winds of this world. If we are righteous, then we will have stability in this world. I don’t mean physical stability, but spiritual. We will be anchored. I think part of the meaning of this is echoed in Ephesians 4 when it says that as we grow in spiritual maturity we will cease to be blown about by every doctrine of man, but we will stand secure upon the true teachings of the word. I think this also applies to the trials that come our way. If we are as a tree and not blown about by the world, then we will be able to endure the trials that come our way and not forsake God, but will remain strong in Him. I think the fact that we are planted by streams of water is also significant. The water is what feeds the tree and allows it to grow big and strong. We are fed by the word and it is the word that allows us to grow in spiritual maturity. The water also gives life and it is by the word that we receive life (Romans 10).

We are also told that the tree produces its fruit in its season. If we are counted as righteous, then we will bear fruit. It isn’t enough to just say that we believe in Christ, we must produce the fruit that that confession leads to. If we aren’t bearing fruit, then we must ask if we were the tree in the first place, because if we are like this tree, then we will bear fruit. This is the sign of a good and healthy tree. A dead tree bears no fruit. Only a tree fed by water can bear fruit and it is only through this life giving water that keeps the tree alive and enables it to bear fruit. So it is with us. If we are not constantly fed with the word, then we lose the power to produce fruit. We must be filled with the word of God.

The next thing that we see is that the leaf of this tree does not wither. A leaf withering is a sign of hibernation and a loss of life to the leaf. A withering leaf is a sign of death. How awesome a promise this is! We do not go into hibernation nor do we suffer death. We will not die spiritually. We will always be filled with life and this will be evident to the external world. A withering leaf is the sign to the world that fall is upon us and winter is soon to come. We know that life has left the leaf when it begins to wither. This is not the case with us. The world should never be able to say of us that the life of Christ has left us and that we are dying. We should always demonstrate true life to the world. They should look at us and see that we possess a life that they do not.

This is not so of the wicked. They do not have any of this, and because of that, they share no inheritance with the righteous. They have no part in us. There is no place for them with us when the judgment comes. They will face eternal destruction and death. Verse 6 tells us that way is not known by the Father, but, rather, it will perish.

This is not true of us. Our way is known by God. We are known by Almighty God. He knows us intimately. He determines our path (Proverbs 16:9). We walk with Him and He knows us. And because He knows us, we are told in John that He calls us and we follow Him. Because He knows us, we know Him and we have an intimate relationship with Him and, through Him, we know the Father. Because of this knowledge we can love Christ in the same manner that the Father loves Christ and Christ is within us (John 17:26). I cannot fathom the depth of this relationship. We are married to Christ. He abides in us and us in Him. What an awesome truth! So we must pay heed to our attitude toward the word. Do we delight in the word and meditate on it day and night? If we do, then all this will be true of us and the promises of God will be real for us. We are given an amazing promise if we delight in the word and are Christians. We are told that in all we do, we will prosper. God will cause all things to turn out for good for us. We cannot fail in this because the promises of God cannot fail. Even if we don’t see an immediate prospering, we can know for sure that we will prosper in the end, because we were promised by God. So we must pursue the knowledge and love of God.

I'm Back!

Sorry it’s been such a long time since my last post. A lot has happened since then. I moved out and my house doesn’t have internet yet, so that is why I haven’t been able to post. In fact, I’m writing this on Monday and it probably won’t be posted until Tuesday. I’m also writing this from Salmon, Idaho. I had a three-day weekend at work (government workers get Columbus day off!) so I spent it hanging out with my sister and brother-in-law. Right now, I am sitting on their couch, looking out their windows at some beautiful scenery. It’s just past sunrise and there are some clouds against the mountains. It is a great place to just relax and enjoy God’s creation. I’ve also had a great time with Kellen and Jen and I’m not looking forward to saying goodbye in a few short hours. We spent some time touring the small town of Salmon, Kellen and I have watched some good football, we’ve watched small herds of deer cross their field (we scattered a couple herds on the way to breakfast), I helped lead Kellen’s stepdad’s horses in, and we’ve spent a lot of time just talking and enjoying each other. In short, it was a great weekend. I only wish it was longer.

As far as moving out goes, I am renting the top half of a friend’s house. They are living in the nicer mother-in-law quarters and are letting me rent out the top half at a great price. The day I moved out, I went to a bunch of thrift stores with my family and got some great deals on furniture. I even found a couch in really good condition for only $35! I’m really happy about that one. My house is completely furnished now. My mom also furnished me with a ton of food, so I am all set. I love my mom. And we’re not just talking Ramen noodles (although I have a ton of those). She cooked me a bunch of homemade stuff and froze it for me. I don’t think I’ll be missing home-cooking for about a month. Kind of kills the whole being on your own thing, though. Eventually I’ll run out and I’ll actually have to start cooking for myself. That should be an adventure. We’ll be getting internet at my house hopefully by Thursday or Friday. I’m looking forward to being connected to the world again. I’ve actually had to try to find things to do apart from going online. It’s been horrible ;) All jesting aside, though, it will be nice to check my e-mails and hopefully I’ll blog a bit more consistently. Oh, I almost forgot. During the move I injured my knee again. I say again because three years ago I blew out my left knee while playing basketball. I didn’t blow it out this time, but I definitely banged it up pretty good. In my parents house we have a wood burning stove and my dad absolutely loves getting wood for it and chopping it and doing the whole lumberjack thing. While we were moving my dresser into our van, I was walking backwards and didn’t see one of the rounds. I tripped over it and fell and the dresser slammed into my knee and momentarily pinned it against the log. It hurt pretty bad and I wasn’t able to lift anything heavy for the rest of the day. I think I got a bad bone bruise, but other than that it seems to be okay. Funny how these things tend to happen when you don’t have medical insurance. And that brings up another point about my job.

Some of you may know that I work for the IRS. Don’t worry, I only file your returns, I don’t audit or do anything that would cause people to hate me. But my department is getting contracted out. So I had to interview with the contractor a couple weeks ago in order to keep my job. I guess I didn’t interview too well because I am getting demoted. Fortunately, it won’t happen until the end of November. But when it does happen, if I take their benefits package I will make almost $3 less per hour. If I don’t take their package, I will make almost the same amount. Basically, I need to find a better job. So if any of you hear of a good job, feel free to let me know. I don’t mind moving out of state either. But, if nothing else comes up, I guess I'll have to be content with what God gives me. I know that if God had wanted me to get a better position with the new company, then He would have made it happened. So I'll rejoice in what the Lord has brought my way.

Over the last week and a half I’ve also been growing closer to God. Amazing how reading more of the word will do that. I’m such a lazy Christian. Anyway, I’ll probably be posting more about that as soon as I get internet at my house. Until then, God bless.

I am not repeating myself

I am not repeating myself, oh man, I'm repeating myself. I can't remember what movie that was in, but whatever it is, it's a good one. Just letting you know, I'm not going crazy with the last two posts, blogger is just having a problem and I didn't think the first post went through. Or maybe I am going crazy. You never can know.

Worship Practice

I have now become one of those guys that sits in the coffee shop working on my computer, surfing the net, etc. Except I don't drink coffee. And if I am drinking something, it's usually a cold drink that barely tastes like coffee. I like the smell, just can't stand the taste.

Tonight was my first time leading worship practice with a real team. By the grace of God it went really well. There is one guy who sings on the team who is just an amazing vocalist and makes everything related to vocals so easy. I also planned three hymns. I think that might be a record for our church. Lord willing, everything will go as smoothly on Sunday as it did tonight. But that usually isn't the case. But in the end, it isn't about me or about how I do or how the team does on Sunday. As a worship team our highest desire is to be invisible and to just get out of the way. Ironically, that means plenty of work needs to be put in in order to not be noticed. Pray that God would humble us and prepare us for Sunday and that He would work through us to impact the congregation.

Also, it's been over a week since I got my first Sandra McCracken cd and I have yet to replace it in my car with anything other than some songs that I needed to listen to for worship. That means that I haven't even been listening to as much Shane and Shane recently. That is pretty impressive. Her other cd that I got, "Gravity," is also really good. My new old S&S cd, "Rocks Won't Cry," is also really good. I highly recommend it. My mom needs to get on the computer now, so I better log off. Until the next time, God bless.

More Piper

I am now the guy at the coffee shop with a computer doing stuff on the internet or writing papers, or whatnot. I am now that guy. Except I'm not drinking coffee. If I am drinking something, it would have to be a cold drink that doesn't taste much like coffee. Just can't stand it. Today, I am about to lead my first worship practice in about 2 hours. Keep me and the rest of the team in prayer as we prepare to lead the people of God in praise of our God. Especially pray for humility for me, because I know how susceptible I am to pride in my life. Speaking of pride, I listened to another couple of Piper sermons today at work and in the second of the two he dealt with I John 2:15-17. Tons of good stuff, but I'll just talk a little bit about "the pride of life." He explained that the pride John was talking about wasn't pride in having life, but looking at the greek word and examining its other uses, he demonstrated that the pride we have is pride in goods or our livlihood. As he explained, the two major catagories of our sin, into which all sin falls, is the desire for what we do not have and pride over what we do have. As the verses go on, we see that these are of the world and the world is passing away. We also have a command from John to abstain from these and love/obey God. Here again, we don't have some command that just limits our fun and happiness. We have a loving command that exhorts us to seek that which is eternal and not what is temporal. He also did a fantastic job of showing that when John talks about faith it is linked completely to our love and obedience of God. Basically, John cannot imagine a saving faith that isn't centered around the love of God, and if we truly love God then we must have saving faith. You can't have one without the other. There is no separation of faith and the love of God which must result in good works otherwise our faith wasn't real. I know I can't do justice to the way Piper said it, but it was really good. It's sermons like that that make me wonder why I aspire to be a preacher. I know I don't have his gift. But, God has commanded us (lovingly) to be faithful in what He has given us no matter how much He has given us. Instead of being jealous, I need to rejoice in what God has given to us through Piper and continually seek the growth of the talents He has given me through the grace of God.

Also, Piper's new book just came out, "What God Commands of the World." It looks really good. Add another book to the list.

A few thing of note continued

Just watching the start of Monday Night Football, and I'm wondering why Bono looks like Justin Timberlake...

I have some big news. I am actually moving out. In fact, Lord willing, I'm moving out this week. Some friends of mine bought a house that has a mother-in-law apartment. They are going to live in the downstairs apartment and I'm going to rent out the top from them. It's pretty exciting. I'm going to be a lot closer to both church and work (although I think it would be hard to get farther away). I'm going to have to get some furniture for the living room, but the kitchen has all the major appliances. I guess maybe I should get a table too, or something. Anyway, I think it will be fun. I'll get to see how well I manage my money when I have to pay rent :) Check back in for pleas for food.

A few things of note

I found out last week that at work I was going to be moved within my own unit to a different area. I wasn't too excited about it. I'm not trying to complain, but my job is pretty boring already and it just got a little more boring. I really wanted to just be mad at my managers and let them all know what I thought about moving me. But, by the grace of God, I didn't and instead really focused on Colossians 3:23 and applied it to my life last week. I found that focusing on God allowed me to be content in the midst of a less than perfect situation. Imagine that! When I lay down my pride and find my joy in humbly obeying the loving commands of God, I really am joyful and I can respond in a godly manner and not destroy my witness. I also found out today that even though the job is more boring, the fact that it doesn't require much mental activity (read: mindless) allowed me to listen to two Piper sermons today. I'm listening to his series on I John. So far, it is really good. In the sermon I listened to today, he said that the reason why we don't obey God's commands is because we are seeking our own happiness away from the will of God. We don't believe or understand that God's commands flow from His love for us and if we really want to be happy and experience the love of God, then we will obey Him. This is the sign of being a true believer: finding your joy and happiness in the loving commands of God. It was a convicting sermon, to say the least, especially in light of my recent struggles at work. All that to say, God is using for good what I thought was a horrible situation. Why is it that being a Calvinist I seem to have less faith in God than most of the Christians I meet? Shouldn't my belief in an absolutely sovereign God have more of an affect on my daily life? My faith is so weak. Praise God, for He is a merciful and patient God that has chosen to use me despite and through my weak faith. To Him be the glory.

More about music?

I wanted you all to know that I have now become the proud owner of all cds that could reasonably be called shane and shane cds. I've owned Carried Away, Psalms, Upstairs, Clean, and An Evening with Shane & Shane for a while now, but I just got the new sampler with them doing bluegrass with the Peasall Sisters and the first Shane Barnard cd, Rocks Won't Cry. RWC has Shane Everett doing some back-up vocals so it can be called an S&S cd. I highly recommend...all of them. Can you really choose between them? They're all amazing. I also highly recommend seeing them in concert if you can. It is a truly worshipful time. Unfortunately, they aren't coming back to Utah anytime soon. I guess if I want to see them I better just move to Texas. I think they've done about a half-dozen concerts there over the last few months. Texas is so lucky.

Also, I'm leading worship at my church Sunday after next. No, I'm not playing any S&S songs (I wish I was good enough). Our worship leader is going to be out of town that day and he asked me to step in. I'm really looking forward to it. I just hope that I'll get out of the way and God will be shown glorious and exalted through me and the rest of the team.

More new music!

For those who don't know, I bought a couple of cds by Sandra McCracken. I just got "The Architect and the Builder" in the mail yesterday and I have listened to it about half a dozen times since then. It is a great cd. This cannot be overstated. Most of the songs are old hymns and she wrote new music for them. Naturally, the lyrics are great and the music is awesome. Her voice is beautiful. I highly recommend it.

Have to go.

A Thought on Paper

A quick thought:
I was talking about the brightness of white paper with Tim today (don't worry it was in jest, we weren't seriously talking about paper brightness) and a thought struck me as I drove home. What defines the brightness of the paper isn't anything intrinsic about the paper itself. In other words, the brightness of the paper doesn't eminate from the paper like it would from a light bulb. Instead the brightness of paper is measured by how much light it reflects. The more light it reflects, the brighter it is considered. This is like us. We are not holy or righteous intrinsically. We have none on our own. The depth of our holiness and righteousness can only be measured by how much and how accurately we reflect the Light. Our righteousness is not our own, it comes from an outside Source. "He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf that we might become the righteousness of God in Him." Christ is the source of our righteousness. The depth to which the world sees this righteousness depends on how well we reflect Christ. Now, I'm assuming some things here, but I think that one of the things that would reduce the brightness of paper would be impurities in it. If I'm right, then the analogy becomes even more vivid. What reduces our ability to reflect the Light is our impurities. The more pure we are, the more capable we are of reflecting Christ. This brightness must also be seen. When light strikes a piece of paper that light reflects back to our eyes and it is there that we see the brightness. As Christians, we receive our brightness from Christ, but that brightness doesn't stop with us, it reflects back to the eyes of the world. We are witnesses to the glory of God and God has chosen us to reveal Him to the world. We need to be an accurate representation of the Light and be bright. Our impurities must be removed so that we can be sine cere and demonstrate Christ to the world.

Fall's Back!

After a brief hiatus, Fall is back in town. The weather has warmed up a little bit, although I still have to scrape the ice off of my car every morning. The sun is shining, the breeze is cool, but not too cold, the colors are vibrant and the air is fresh. It's wonderful. I love it. Especially since I'm not in class or doing homework right now. It's great. A quick update on my paper on relativism. I've written about five pages so far but I'm not very happy with the last couple pages. I think it will be easier to just delete them and rewrite them rather than try to edit them into something workable. Hopefully I'll have it done sometime soon, though. Also, I hope to post on something more serious in the next few days, but lately I haven't wanted to post on what I've been thinking about. We'll see what happens over the next few days.

Talk to you later and God bless.

The end of fall?

Yes ladies and gentlemen, that white substance on the mountains is indeed snow. In fact, we even got some of that white stuff at my house, which is at about 5,000 feet. But, I don't think this is the end of fall yet. It's supposed to get up to 75 in the middle of the week and I'm looking forward to some good fall weather. Even so, I heard that this is the earliest it has snowed here in 70 years! That's incredible to me.

Other than that, pretty good day. I went to a friend's wedding. It was a good wedding and my family and I spent a lot of time with some friends at the reception. We had a really good time. It's getting a little late so I think I'll keep this short tonight. May God grant you all a blessed Sunday.

Update

If you've been reading this, then you know that I posted a while ago about calling a person that had something against me. I got a call back from that person last Saturday. Unfortunately I was in the middle of moving Kellen and Jen and didn't have the time to really talk about the situation, but I made sure that he wanted to talk about it and I told him I would call him back early the next week. By the grace of God I followed through and called him back Monday afternoon. Again, I didn't reach him, but I left a message. This time he called back within a couple hours. We ended up talking about 45 minutes. Unfortunately, there was no reconciliation at the end of the conversation. It brings me a great deal of sadness that the situation is what it is. I believe that throughout the conversation, by the grace of God, I was humble and loving toward him. But, in the end, we were still on opposite sides of a very personal issue. After analyzing the issue again, and through much prayer, I cannot change my position. I believe that it would be sacrificing truth on the alter of peace to change my stance. I am deeply sorrowful over the situation and long for our fellowship and friendship to be restored. I leave it in God's hands. He will do what He will in this situation and in our hearts. I only ask that you pray for humility in me to see the truth and will of God and the faith to follow wherever that will might lead. Praise our Lord and Savior! He is indeed over and above all situations and can turn the hearts of men like rivers of water! There is none like Him! He will have His way, I cannot thwart it! He gives and He takes away. Praise the Lord, O my soul!

Fall

There are few things better than the smell of the beginning of a storm and the rain hitting dry dirt? Or the freshness just after the rain. The feeling of a cool breeze can't be beat either. I love fall. The hills are on fire with reds and oranges and yellows. It's getting cooler and the weather is beginning to change. I think this is my favorite time of the year.

Cut Capo

A couple nights ago, I made a cut capo for myself! I know, I know. You're all incrediblely excited for me. It's absolutely amazing. Seriously, though, I am pretty excited about it. If you don't know what a capo is, it basically makes it easier to play in certain keys by covering all the strings across a fret. The cut capo only covers three strings making an Esus chord. Basically, it makes it possible to play one-finger chords and do some cool things. Plus, Shane Bernard (or is Barnard) uses one on some of his songs. I'm pretty excited about it.

Bittersweet Farewell

I now know what that phrase means. We left Salmon today at 3 p.m. and got home about an hour ago. It was really hard to say goodbye. But, we know that it isn't forever. We'll talk a lot and I might even go back up there in a month. But our lives won't be the same and we won't get to see them nearly as much as we want to. But it was sweet in that we know that they are doing what God desires of them and they are embracing it with joy. We rejoice with them, but we are sad to see them leave. But, as Kellen's mom said, we will have forever, this life is just a vapor. I can't wait for heaven. To see my savior, to worship Him perfectly, to enjoy perfect fellowship with all the saints as we worship God. It's going to be awesome. I can't wait!

Our time in Salmon was really good. I got to ride up with Kellen in his old, beat-up car and we had a good time. We didn't have A/C but the weather was just about perfect. We rolled the windows down and just cruised. Unloading all their stuff went pretty easy. Bill, Kellen's step-dad, cooked some great meals (ham the first night, salmon and elk steaks today). It was a really good weekend. But I am exhausted physically and emotionally. I'm glad I took tomorrow off.

I hope that you all had great Sundays. God Bless.

The Soul's Delight

Be still, my soul
Find rest, my soul
You have been led by still waters
Drink deep, my soul
Be restored

Shout joyfully, my soul
Sing praise, my soul
To the King of all ages
Rejoice, my soul
And be glad

Why cast down, my soul?
Hope in God, my soul
Send out Your light and truth
Praise Him, my soul
Be overjoyed

I will seek You, O God
I see Your glory, O God
Your steadfast love is better than life
I will praise You, O God
O God, my God

Greekfest!!

Today was the Salt Lake City Greekfest! The Greekfest is awesome! This is the third or fourth straight year I've been to it. Or something like that. Anyway, we try to go every year. Tonight was also Kellen and Jen's last day in Utah. We leave tomorrow morning. They love the Greekfest so much that they planned their departure date so that they could still go to it. We went with some friends, had some great food, had some great desert, toured the Greek Orthodox Church, and talked to Father Matthew about Greek Orthodoxy. To boil it down, I basically found out that Greek Orthodoxics (Orthodoxians, Orthodoxites? who knows?) don't believe that Christ paid the full penalty for our sins. They believe that it simply bought the opportunity for salvation for all of us and we have to work (although they wouldn't use that term) the rest of the way. In other words, it's basically the same as infused grace as opposed to imputed grace. It was a very interesting conversation. We were encouraged to e-mail our questions to him and I think I'll take him up on that. Anyway, we ate tons of food and had a really good time together. I'm looking forward to next year. Jen and Kellen are already planning on being back in town for it.

I think there was someting I wanted to post about but now I've forgotten it. Don't you hate it when that happens? I'm really enjoying reading "A Case for Amillenialism." It's challenging and very interesting. Looking forward to getting more in depth on the subject.

Well, I'll be travelling to Salmon, Idaho tomorrow so I won't be posting for a few days (what else is new?). May God bless you and be near to you. His nearness is our good.

New Beginnings

I just started that paper I mentioned earlier. I really enjoyed writing an introduction to a paper like that. I can't believe that I'm actually missing that. Inconceivable! Anyway, I haven't written anything past the intro but its a start. Starting is usually the hardest part for me. Now we'll just see how long it takes to finish it.

I also just started "A Case for Amillenialism" by Kim Riddlebarger a couple days ago. I'm only two chapters in, but I can tell that it is definitely going to challenge almost everything I grew up believing about the tribulation, rapture, and millenium. It might be hard, but I'm submitted to the word of God and will go where He leads me. You can pray for understanding for me and humility to continue to submit to the word and will of God.

Today was also Cordell's first worship practice. It will be different without Kellen leading us, but I think God is teaching me that it isn't about the person leading music, but the God we worship. He is the center of our worship. I think I get caught up too much in the physical and temporal, especially in areas like this. It certainly is a time of submitting to God in all things right now.

The Last Sunday

Yesterday was Jen and Kellen's last Sunday at CCC. It's hard to even write about it without tearing up. Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy for them. But it's sad to see them go at the same time. Plenty of tears were shed by me and my family. I think I'll be spending a lot more time on the phone then I used to. At least I better. I'll be talking to them quite a bit. We will be moving them up to Idaho on Saturday and spending the weekend with them. So this week is going to be really packed. There are two going away parties for them, Bible Study on Wednesday and worship practice with the new leader, Friday is the Greekfest in SLC and Saturday we leave. Definitely busy.

I also ended up in a pretty interesting discussion last night after the college/young adult group meeting. We meet at the pastor's house and I ended up talking with the pastor and a friend of mine about covenantalism and dispensationalism. My friend and I were on the covenental side and my pastor was on more of the dispensational side, although he isn't a hard-liner or anything. We agree on a lot of things. It was a good argument that lasted about two-and-a-half hours. To kind of give some background on me, I wouldn't really call myself a covenantalist or a dispensationalist, although I'm pretty sympathetic to the covenantal side. I grew up not learning much about either side and am just now starting to really dig into it. So, I'm looking for insights and information from those more familiar with the whole debate. Specific verses that either side uses, books, etc. Anything would be helpful. I'm really interested in learning more about covenantalism. I can't believe that I haven't heard more about it until now, especially since I've been a five-pointer since I was a teenager. Anyway, that was my Sunday.

A few random oddities

I just saw the newest Burger King commercial with their mascot "The King" doing a press conference with Drew Rosenhaus, who is Terrell Owens agent. It may not be very funny for non-football fans or those who haven't seen Rosenhaus' press conference last year. But for me, it was hilarious. Those Burger King commericials are kind of hit or miss with me (mostly miss) but this one was pretty funny.

I realized today that even though I don't miss going to school, I do miss parts of it. I was driving home and I thought of a really good topic for a paper. I just finished reading David Wells' Above All Earthly Pow'rs (which is a great book) and was thinking about the postmodern view of relativity and realized that it is definitially impossible. As I thought about it I started putting an argument together and developing an outline. I thought that would be a great topic for a philosophy paper. Maybe I'll write it anyway for the heck of it and for the practice of writing papers. Who would have thought that I, of all people, would miss writing papers? If I do write it, I think I'll send it to one of my philosophy professors and see what his reaction to it is. Maybe it will open up an avenue for talking about God.

Speaking of talking about God, I went out with a few people from my church Wednesday and passed out some tracts in downtown Ogden. John (the lebanese missionary), Don, and I ended up talking to a Catholic guy for about thirty minutes. It was a good conversation. We talked about Mary and Purgatory and Mass and a bunch of other topics. We gave him the word of God and presented the truth to him. He said he would try to come to our church, but that's because he considers himself open-minded, not because he was convicted. Either way, I hope to see him on Sunday and talk to him some more. We're also going to try to go out on a regular basis to pass out tracts and evangelize. We'll see what the Lord does with it.

Submission long in coming

Today I finally submitted to the will of God in a certain area of my life. To set the scene, I found out that there was someone who had something against me, which was making this person feel incapable of fellowshiping with me. I found out about this almost two months ago. The Bible tells us that if we know that our brother has something against us then we must go to him and attempt to be reconciled. I disobeyed that for the better part of two months. The minute I knew about it, I knew that I should call this person, but I didn't want to because of the pain that I knew would ensue. Then I read a freshword from Piper that really convicted me on this. However, if you check the date on that article, you'll see it was written in early August and we are now at the end. So I still wasn't obeying God, despite my conscience. Over the last few days, I have been really seeking the will of God for my life, particularly my future. But to do the will of God in the future requires that we pursue the will of God in the present and I realized on my drive home from work that if I wanted to do the will of God, I needed to call this person today. I'm not saying that I believe that I will now all of a sudden know what God's will for my future is, but it removes a significant roadblock in that journey.

Unfortunately, I didn't actually talk to this person, but I did leave a message explaining why I was calling and told this person that I really desired a call back. I sincerely love this person and desire fellowship again, but my actions (or lack thereof) over the last couple months haven't shown it. I know that there will probably be a good deal of pain to come in the near future, but that is often the path that love must take. I know that no matter how much pain might come, God is with me and will never forsake me. God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble. May God humble me in this.

My dilemma

I think I might be getting writer's block because I just don't know how to start a post anymore (assuming I ever knew how). Today was Kellen and Jen's second-to-last Sunday and I'm sure that everybody is getting tired of me writing about them, but you'll have to put up with a little bit more. We played a song that Kellen wrote today titled "Holy is He." It's a really good song. Very worshipful, very contemplative. To me, it reminded me a lot of "Facedown" by Matt Redman. The sermon was also very good today. It was about the supremacy of the Word of God over ourselves and how we should submit to everything that it says about our lives. If we truly love God and consider the Bible to be His inspired word, then we will desire to read it and submit to it. It was a very good message.

Speaking of submission, that's something that's really been on my mind the last 15 hours or so. It was spurred on by a conversation I had with Kellen last night around 11:30. God has really been pressing something onto my heart and I'm struggling with how to respond to it. I don't know if I'm not being submissive in this situation or if God hasn't revealed everything to me yet. It's a hard line to draw for me. When does my waiting become a lack of faith and disobedience? Am I being prudent and wise or am I really not willing to give it all up and follow Him? I don't really know how to answer it. I don't want to be like Gideon and constantly be asking God for a sign, but I also don't want to rush into something that I shouldn't. I only pray that this dilemma will drive me closer to God and into a deeper reliance on Him.

Catching up

Time really does fly. It's been a while since I've posted. Just want to say to all the people going back to school on Monday: Enjoy the year, glad I won't be joining you. Seriously, I think the best part of being graduated is seeing everyone else go back and knowing that you are done with that. I know it sounds cruel, but for those in college, you'll know what it's like soon enough.

I have been really busy over the last week. Or at least it's felt like it. Monday and Tuesday I helped people move. Monday it was some friends of mine, Luke and Andhrea Ray. In fact, if I can rustle up a couple of roommates, I might end up moving into the upstairs part of their house. They're living in the basement mother-in-law quarters. I guess if it's the Lord's will, He will provide some roommates for me. From my perspective it seems like a great situation potentially, but we'll see what God wants for me. Tuesday, I helped move most of my sister and brother-in-law's big furniture into his mom and stepdad's horse trailer and they took that back to Salmon with them. Seeing how empty their apartment is makes their move that much more of a reality. In only two weeks they'll be moving away. It doesn't seem real. It probably won't hit home until they actually move.

In the days that I haven't been moving people, I've spent a lot of time hanging out with a missionary that my church supports. His name is John Hayes and he is with Arabs for Christ. Right now he is doing the Lord's work in Lebanon and will be returning there Sept. 13. Hearing him talk it's hard to believe that he's only 21. He's done more in his life than I might do in the rest of mine. It has been really encouraging talking to him. In fact, I went out with him and another guy twice to pass out tracts and evangelize in a local park. It didn't seem to bear much fruit, but hopefully by God's grace we were able to plant some seeds that will be watered some day. Either way, I know that His word will not return void, even if that return isn't exactly what we were looking for.

That brings me to today. Early this afternoon, I went out with John and Nate and ended up talking to this guy that had set up this booth in the park and was offering free lessons in some Chinese cult meditation thing (I forget the name of the cult). We talked about a lot but one of the most serious things was when we asked him whom he served and submitted to. He basically said that he served many gods and when we asked him what their names were he told us that he would rather keep that to himself. And when we asked him what the main god was that he worshipped he gave us some weird name that I had never heard before. There were definitely some demonic forces at work in his life. It was very noticeable. We shared the gospel with him and his only response to the truth was that he honored our testimony and the conversation pretty much ended there. It was definitely a sobering encounter and one that made us turn to God in prayer for him soon after.

Today there was also a welcome home party for Ryan and Micah. Ryan returned from North Carolina where he has been working all summer and Micah got back from basic training. It was great to catch up with them. Although I won't have much time to hang out with Ryan because he was offered a great job with the company he was working for and will be going back to live in North Carolina. God definitely gave him a great opportunity to make some good money and complete his education at the same time. I'll definitely be going out to visit him some time when I have the time and money. But at least Micah is back for the next two or three years and I'll be able to hang out with him a bunch. They are both just great guys who really love the Lord and desire to glorify Him. It is really encouraging to talk to them and enjoy their fellowship again.

Anyway, this post is starting to get long. I'll try to update it a bit more frequently from now on. God bless and may you have a great Sunday.

Why am I still awake?

I have not gone to bed before 11:00 so far this week. So why am I writing this? I don't really know. This week has been crazy so far. Every night's been late (at least for me), I've been doing something every night that usually involves thinking and a lot of involvement, mentally and spiritually, and I've had some tough days at work. Today, at Kellen and Jen's place I just crashed. I felt like I had been through the spiritual and emotional gauntlet and was just melencholy (that's the only word that seems to fit). It's like you try to gear yourself up for something but lack all energy and desire. What a help the psalms are in times like these. By the grace of God, the Holy Spirit brought to mind Psalm 23 and 19 and the fact that it is God and His word that restores and revives our soul. I think that God brings these times into our lives so that we will understand a little bit more that we can't stand on our own, but we need to rely on God for everything. It's like we are a house that has one support under us: God. But we think that we need something else so we stack straw, hay, and twigs to help hold the weight of the house and steady it. God brings storms along to knock away these false hopes and supports and get us to trust the One and only support we need. God is our only pillar and we need to stop putting up false supports. God's grace is sufficient for us and in our weakness he is shown strong. I know that I need to humble myself, be weak, and give the glory and honor to the only strong and sufficient God.

He restores our souls for His name's sake. His word revives us. Come, let us return to the Lord. For He has torn us, but He will heal us; He has wounded us, but He will bandage us. He will revive us, He will raise us up so that we may live before Him. Press on to know Him for He will come to us like the rain.

My big news

As I mentioned in my last blog, I would tell you guys today or tomorrow my big news and a decision I came to. I'll start with the decision I came to.

As the header to my blog states, I desire to be a preaching pastor someday. I believe that God is calling me to apply to The Bethlehem Institute to further that desire and call to ministry. In case any of you don't know what TBI is, it is based out of Bethlehem Baptist Church, of which John Piper is the pastor for preaching. It has three tracks. The first is for young believers and is more basic, the second is an apprenticeship program for training biblical elders, and the third is for missionaries. Lord willing, I'll be applying for the second track. Why TBI and not a seminary? First, TBI doesn't rule out the possibility of seminary and if I was to go to seminary some of the credits might transfer over. Some universities even accept up to fifty semester credits even though TBI isn't accredited. Second, I like the idea of apprenticeship and working alongside the elders in ministry. If I am accepted, I will learn from them a number of practical things and how a church works along with all of the academic and spiritual pursuits. Plus, I don't think you can beat learning how to preach directly from John Piper. Lord willing, I am really looking forward to learning under a man that has been used by God for so much and has a tremendous spiritual gift. Anyway, that is the decision the Lord has led me to and we'll see where the Lord takes it.

Now for the news. God has really been working on me in the area of missions and it has become something that I am very passionate about. I believe that the American church desperately needs to have a missions mindset. We need to understand that the American dream we have been pursuing isn't the Christian reality. We are the richest nation in the history of the world and we barely give anything to missions. We are the rich man who lets everyone know how much we are giving even though it is a fraction of our wealth when we need to be the widow and give everything we have, even if it is only a few pennies. We are drowning in the sea of our own affluence and I think that a focus on missions will help us to see more clearly the glory of God and leave behind the riches of this world. Furthermore, if we are to be a church that focuses on the glory of God, then we must be a church that finds its joy in spreading that glory to the ends of the earth. This week I conveyed these thoughts to my pastor, Tom and Hugh, the elder in charge of the missions board. Hugh hasn't been able to be very active with the missions board recently and, unbeknownst to me, has been looking for someone with a similar passion to take it over. He asked me to pray about it and God is definitely leading me to do that. So today I became the official chair of the missions board. I'm hoping that the Lord will use me to develop a culture of missions at the body in West Point.

In addition to this, throughout this growing conviction another desire has begun to take root. That desire is, at some point in my life, to become a missionary to an unreached people. I don't know when or even if it will happen, but it certainly has been my desire recently. I think it would be awesome to be used by God in that way. To die in that service would certainly not be a vain death. But we'll see where God takes that as well.

Until next time, God bless.

Recent happenings

At the end of my last post I mentioned some big news about myself. This isn't the post where that is revealed. I hope to talk about it Sunday or Monday. But until then, here are some of the lesser things that have happened to me.

On Wednesday night Tim and Amy came over after the Bible study I do with Tim. And while I have a winstreak of 1 on Tim in virtual chess, my flesh and blood chess losing streak continued. I don't know how long it is, sufice it to say that I have never beaten him in a real game. Although I came really close this time.

Last night, the Christ Community Church softball season ended. We lost our playoff game by one run. That may not sound too bad, but we were up by as much as eight at one point. It was a good, fun season. Especially since it was my first time playing organized ball. I played okay for the most part and had a really good game last night. Two-for-two with two runs scored. Now Tim and I want to practice more before next season so we can do even better.

I did something yesterday that I swore I would never do. I actually bought a country cd. I'm a little embarrassed to admit it right now, but the Bible says that we should confess our sins to one another. First I must explain why. I traded a bunch of videogames in to Graywhale because it's been about six months or more since I've played a videogame. I ended up getting more store credit then I thought I would and they had a used Carrie Underwood cd there. Why her cd? I must admit that I like that song "Jesus, take the wheel" and she can actually sing, unlike some country singers I've heard. I haven't listened to it yet, so I'll give my report on it after I've had a chance to evaluate it. Wow! That was hard, but it had to be done.

Those are the highlight from the last few days minus my big news. The next time I post it will be about that and a decision I came to a couple of weeks ago. Until then, God bless.

I'm through passing the time

Okay, I can now reveal the news that was mentioned a little over a week ago. And no, nobody is pregnant. Jen and Kellen are moving to Salmon, Idaho to help out a small church up there by leading worship and doing other things. This may not seem to be huge news to anybody else, but it is to me. There are a couple of reasons why this is so big. The first is simply that it is going to be hard on me, my family, and my church to not have Kellen and Jen with us and so accessable. Kellen is easily my closest friend. In fact, I've never had a deeper friendship with anyone else before. This isn't to the detriment of any of my other friends, Kellen and I just have a unique bond. I know that through my relationship with Kellen I have grown closer to God. So it will be hard for me when they leave in September. And, not to leave Jen out, it will be hard to see her go as well. As a family we are all really close and have never spent an extended period of time away. My two sisters and I all went to the same local university and have never lived far apart. So it will be hard from that perspective. It's also been a long time since Jen and I have gone to the same church and I have treasured the last 5-6 months that we have had together at CCC. It will also be hard for my church. You can't really replace a worship leader like Kellen. God has just gifted him so much in that area. And that model of a godly wife that Jen presents will be missed as well. I don't think that we will truly grasp how much they meant to us as a church until they are gone.

And yet, despite the difficulties and the tears (my eyes well up just writing this), my heart rejoices with them. And this is the second reason why this is big news. Kellen and Jen are obviously doing what God has called them to do and are beginning a journey that will lead them even further down the path that God has prepared for them. This is an amazing step for them and is truly a missionary journey. Salmon has a population of about 3,500. But in that small population they have a number of churches (at least 10-12) and only two of them could be considered solid. There are a number of very liberal churches, perhaps even an occult presence, and of course a mormon presence. The church they are going to only has about 25 people so it will definitely be a missionary endevour. I am constantly reminded of Paul's statement "sorrowful, yet always rejoicing." I am indeed sad that they will be leaving, but I rejoice to know that they are going to do the will of God and pursue what He has called them to.

There is also some big news in my life, but I will leave that for my next post. So as I end this post, I just ask that you would pray for my sister and brother-in-law. That they would find joy and peace in doing His will, that the hearts and minds of the people in Salmon would be open to the gospel of the glory of God in the face of Christ, and that they would never tire of doing the will of God and studying to show themselves approved.

Just passing the time

Some of you may have noticed that I have added some links on the side. I don't know html so I'm having a little bit of trouble with it, but I think I'll get Tim to help me out next Wednesday or something.

Anyway, right now I am at Weber State just trying to kill some time before my first playoff softball game, which is at 9:30. Yes, that is at night. I don't know why they have games so late, but whatever. I guess it's not for me to question why. So if this post is a little boring, I apoligize.

An interesting thing happened to me at work today. I came to the realization that I hadn't been witnessing as much at work as I was a couple of weeks ago. It concerned me, so, while at work, I prayed that in some way I would prove to be a faithful witness, whether by word or deed. A short time later, an older woman I know came up to me and we talked a little bit. And then she asked me if I would pray for her soul because she knew that the thoughts that she had toward her ex-husband were "evil" and worthy of hell (I don't know if she really meant the last part or if it was just an expression). I responded that we all deserve hell and that forgiveness is found in God. It was right around then that a coworker interrupted us and she went back to work. I don't know anything about her religious background and very little about her life so I don't know why she came to me and asked me this except that she knows who I am and what I believe. I started praying for her the minute she walked away. She may not have known what it meant to ask me to pray for her soul, but she asked for it and I will surely grant her her request and I would ask anyone who reads this to join with me in praying for her salvation and my witness to her.

The lab aide just told us that we have 15 minutes so I better get going.

God bless.

Something to pass the time

To be honest, there is something I would much rather post about, but I don't know when I'll be able to give anybody details due to the fact that it's not my news. So I'm trying to just pass the time between posts.

Since I just posted a meme (I'm with Micah, just what is a meme anyway?) on books I thought I would do one on movies. Maybe I'll copy Lauren sometime in the future and do one on music. Here it is (with blatant plagerism from both of their memes):

1. Best movie of all time: There are a lot of movies vying for this spot, but I think I'll go with Gladiator or maybe Last of the Mohicans (my sisters call this the "man training movie"). I love those movies.

2. Best action/war movie: Without naming the above movies, I would say Black Hawk Down. And the best part is that it is a fairly accurate portrayal of what happened.

3. Best comedy: I have to admit that I am a fan of stupid comedies (Happy Gilmore, Dumb and Dumber, etc.). But I think that the best would have to be The Goonies (not a stupid comedy by any stretch). Runner-up: Much Ado About Nothing

4. Best "chick-flick": Pride and Prejudice, without a doubt. I would say the 6-hour miniseries rather than the two-hour movie, but we're talking movies here, not miniseries.

5. One movie that you saw more than once in the theater: Pirates of the Carribean. I think I saw it at least three times.

6. One movie that you thought you would hate but ended up loving it: The Ringer. I know it sounds horrible, but it really was a funny movie and didn't make fun of the mentally handicapped like I thought it would.

7. Best movie quote: "Hello. My name is Enigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." - The Princess Bride (and for some reason, I don't think I got his name right, it has been a while since I watched it).

8. Movie you can watch over and over and not get bored: What's up Doc? If you haven't seen this '70s comedy with Ryan O'Neal and Barbara Streisand, then you haven't lived. I've been watching this movie since I was a kid and I still watch it and laugh at all the same spots. Absolutely classic.

9. Movie that should be made: Yeah, I'm stealing this one and the next from Micah. A decent version of The Scarlet Pimpernel. I watched one version, and it was terrible. They need to do that book justice in the movie world.

10. Movie that never should have been made: This is an easy one. Star Wars: The Phantom Menace. I did like Episode 2 and I loved Episode 3, but this movie made me want to run back to the original series. Let's face it, they just can't make them any better than the original trilogy.

11. Movie that made you cry: Okay, one more rip-off. Hotel Rwanda. I didn't cry until the very end when all the emotional tension that's built up is just released when they find the wife's nieces at the end. Tears of joy and grief just start streaming. Just embrace it, because you can't fight it.

12. Best movie not on this list: The Indiana Jones Trilogy. You gotta love those movies.

Bonus Question
Best miniseries of all time: I had to throw this one in. It's a tie between Pride and Prejudice and Band of Brothers. I love both of those and could watch them over and over.

Anyway, that's my meme. I won't tag anybody because it just doesn't seem right to tag someone with a meme I came up with. I don't know why, I guess it's just me. But if anyone would like to do it for fun, then feel free to copy it.

I'll let everyone know if I change my mind on any answers. I'll also be spilling the beans here on the first topic after they've been spilled in the real world.

I've been tagged

1. One book that changed your life: The Bible, obviously (outside of that, Don't Waste Your Life by John Piper)
2. One book that you've read more than once: Non-fiction: Don't Waste Your Life Fiction: To Kill a Mockingbird
3. One book you'd want on a desert island: The Bible
4. One book that made you laugh: That's a hard one. I'll have to go back to my childhood for that (as if I ever left). I would say James and the Giant Peach.
5. One book that made you cry: Do I have to name just one? There have been quite a few. It's kind of a three-way tie between Lil' Britches, Where the Red Fern Grows, and The Yearling. The latter reminds me of a line from a Johnny Cash song: "You'll never read that book again because the ending's just too hard to take."
6. One book that you wish had been written: Lord of the Rings: The Continuing Story
7. One book that you wish had never been written: Oliver Twist. I know, I know, it's a classic and a lot of people love Dickens. But this book was just a constant downer and almost nothing good ever happened to him. I got three-quarters of the way through and put it down and have never picked it back up. I have never been that far in a book and not read the rest of it. The Scarlet Letter could also fit this catagory. It was boring, tedious, and slow, and I knew what was going to happen two chapters before it happened the whole way through.
9. One book you've been meaning to read: The City of God by Augustine and Calvin's Institutes.
10. Now tag five people: If you're reading my blog and you haven't been tagged yet, then consider this a tag. (I guess that means you, Tim)

And the correct answer is...

It turns out that Pioneer Day is the celebration of when the Mormons settled in the Salt Lake Valley in 1857 (I think that year is right).

A Longing Satisfied

A depth of feeling
The stirring of my soul
My enitre being
Longing to be whole

Looking for what satisfies
Searching, I roam
The wandering of my eye
Leaves me alone

You are my desire
The delight of my soul
And in my passion, the fire
You made me whole

You stirred my soul
And You brought forth life
And in the depths of Sheol
You put to death strife

I am Yours
And You are mine
And along this road
You sanctify

Through fire and trial
The valley of death
There is no denial
You alone will I bless

You are my Light
My Savior, My God
In You I delight
With You do I trod

"Today was a good day."

For those who were wondering, that quote comes from The Last Samurai (is that even spelled right, I don't know). I'll try to keep this short.

Today, for those who don't know, is Mormon Day. Technically it is called Pioneer Day. It is the day that this state was founded or when the mormons came from Missouri and settled in Utah. To tell you the truth, I'm really not sure. I just know that it is a big deal with the mormons and everyone else makes fun of them (yes all 2,000 of us). So to celebrate it, they usually have fireworks somewhere. And because the Huntsville fireworks were cancelled on the fourth because of rain, we had them tonight. So I watched the fireworks from the porch with my parents and Kellen and Jen (my older sister and brother-in-law). Before that we had dinner, I took a drive with Kellen, and we walked around the neighborhood with my younger sister and her husband's dog (they are on vacation). So this evening was really good and just a relaxed time spent with my family.

Today at work we had a few exciting things happen as well. I work in a glorified warehouse and apparently we have bats in the rafters. Today, we found three dead ones. I had never seen a bat up close before, but I can now say that I have. They are basically mice with wings. By the way, their wings are really cool. But that isn't the most exciting part. I was standing in a hall with my manager looking for a document and I looked down the hall and saw a bat flying toward us. I was pretty surprised and, I must say, startled and said something like "Whoa! A bat!" My exclamation freaked my boss out even though she didn't see the bat and she uttered a small scream. The bat must have passed about one foot or so behind us and I got to see it fly past and around a corner. I was pretty awesome seeing them fly. They are graceful flyers. God's creation is truly amazing.

Anyway, that kind of sums up my day.

P.S. I have listened to the entire Johnny Cash cd a couple of times and the whole cd is great. I give it my full recommendation (which probably doesn't mean that much but you should check out the cd anyway).

Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?

"I thin' so Brain. But where are we going to find a duck in the hose at this time of night?"

In case you weren't aware of one of the greatest cartoon shows of all time, this is one of my favorite quotes from Pinky and the Brain. And I just found out that it's coming out on dvd Tuesday. I think that's a must-buy for me.

And to add to today's excitement, I just beat Tim in our online chess game! And it only took 31 moves and half of my pieces to do it. Looking forward to the rematch. If anyone else is interested in playing, the website is www.redhotpawn.com and my screen name is DBo. Don't worry, I'm really not that good at chess. I was just providentially blessed to beat Tim this one time :)

Have a blessed Sunday, everyone.

A few items on the docket

Heh Heh, another court reference. [insert joke that I think is funny but really isn't]

Item number one - I was driving to work on Friday and I decided to listen to KLOVE (the nation-wide contemporary christian music station) and the morning people were commenting on a new audio Bible. It's called The Bible Experience. And, it is narrated by celebrities, some of whom are Christian (Kirk Franklin, etc.) some of whom are not (Cuba Gooding Jr., Denzel Washington and his wife, etc.). Now, I'm all for celebrities reading the Bible and hearing the truth. However, I am not for selling an audio Bible by marketing it as "narrated by celebrities." It's like hearing Christmas carols sung by secular artists. For instance, I love Bing Crosby's voice, but I can't listen to him singing about the blessed savior's birth when he isn't saved. It's greed and they can't glorify God through it, even if Christians can glorify God through it. That's just one of my pet peeves, not some universal truth that everyone must abide by. But what really ticked me off is that one of the morning show people responded to this press release by exclaiming how cool it was. How can that be cool? How is it that what makes the word of God cool is that fact that it is read by celebrities? Celebrities don't make the Bible cool. How long will the church suffer under our blasphemous pop culture? When will we stop idolizing the things that the world idolizes. It is an insult to God to imply that His word needs window dressing to appear cool or to appeal to our culture. It isn't the messenger, it's the message. And why are we excited about an unsaved messenger in the first place. This is the same kind of frustration I have with The Message and those New Testaments that look like teen magazines and are filled with make-up tips and whatever is in the guys version. Even the fact that they have a guys and girls version of the New Testament bothers me. Why do we dumb down the word of God so that those who can't understand it anyway (i.e. the unregenerate) will think that they can. The Spirit is what opens our eyes, not fourth-grade level words.

Whew! Cooled off a little bit now. The next thing is that Jonathan Edwards rocks. He was truly given an incredible gift by God. I am in awe of his God-given gift to argue and persuade and define, etc. The Freedom of the Will is looking like it's going to be a great book. I just finished Section 2 of Part 2 and I was trying to figure out where he was going to go with it and I came up with this. The will cannot determine itself. It must be determined by something outside the will. So what determines the will? He has already stated that our strongest inclination does. What determines that? Our nature and is influenced by other external things like the world and demonic forces. Obviously, this means that if someone is unregenerate then his will can never be to do the will of God and therefore he cannot help but sin because his strongest inclination is always to sin. So what determines his nature and its influences? Ultimately, this chain ends in God. God determines our wills. But what determines God? God determines God. More specifically, the desire to glorify himself is what determines how God determines our wills. So this leaves us with the question that Micah posed: What do we do with the fact that there is evil and evil intentions in the world? Does God determine evil? I won't fully answer this but will suggest that you read his post on this, which is a summary of John Gerstner's position on this. It's really good. On a side-note, when Gerstner talks about good good and evil good I interpret the second term, which is always good, as relating directly to God's intentions and the first term as relating to our intentions as shown in Gen. 50:20.

The third and final thing (sorry for the length). When I was reading FOTW I started to think about eternity which is something that I don't think we do nearly enough. (By the way, if you took out some of the words in that sentence you would get "I think that I don't think" which is a pretty true statement.) When I start thinking about eternity I think about a tunnel and relate that to my life. My life is like going through a tunnel. You can see the light at the end of the tunnel and it grows stronger all the time until you reach the end and then you're done with the tunnel. In eternity, not only do you fail to reach the end of the tunnel you don't even see the light at the end because there isn't one. It never stops. We are in a never-ending tunnel filled with the brightness of the glory of God and we will never get to the end of it. I can't help but smile at the thought. Everything I know on this world has an end and we think in terms of beginnings and endings. But with eternity it doesn't have an end and this blows my mind. We will spend an eternity in the loving embrace of our savior. It doesn't end. I just can't get my mind around it. Wow! God, bring your kingdom now or end my life so that I can be with you which is far better. But until then, I have a purpose on this earth and my time serving You is not yet done. Let me serve You with humility and a heart that longs to see You glorified in everything. A heart that glows with Your truth and will never hide its light. To God be the glory.

If it please the court...

I was just watching "A Few Good Men" on tv, which, by the way, is the best courtroom movie of all time as far as I'm concerned. In the final scene Tom Cruise's character asks the judge to stop the trial so that Jack Nicholsen's character can be arrested. When he makes the request though he begins by saying "If it please the court..." and this phrasing added more proof to Piper's and Edwards' theology (along with many others). When asking whether or not the court would do something the question is put into the context of the court being pleased by the doing. Therefore, the court does what pleases it. The court doesn't decide something that fails to please it. We, likewise, don't do anything that doesn't please us. Our doing and our being pleased are the same. Or, as Edwards would put it, our will is to do that which is our strongest inclination.

This concept always convicts me. If we always do what pleases us, then what does that mean about when we sin? I know that all of you know this, but it always strikes me. When I sin, it is because I loved the sin more than I loved God. I sought the fleeting pleasure of sin rather than the eternal, all-satisfying pleasure of God. And then I think about how often I sin every day. How often I choose the world over God. And then our thoughts should be turned to the awesome promise of God. That we no longer live in the darkness, we no longer live in the slavery to sin. We don't have to keep seeking our pleasure and satisfaction in this world. We can truly have it in God. We no longer live but Christ lives in us. Yes, we need to remember that we are sinners and our flesh is desparately wicked. But we can't stop there. We need to remember that we no longer live in the darkness but we live in the light now and, through the grace of God and the sacrifice of Christ, we now have the ability to not sin. We must humble ourselves before God by the grace of God and live like the redeemed.

I don't know if this is easy for anybody else, but it's something that I struggle with from time to time. It's like I constantly seek forgiveness for the same sin and forget that that sin has been paid for and forgiven and I need to forget what lies behind and press on to what lies ahead. To kind of sum it up by way of an analogy: I'm no longer a caterpillar but a butterfly and I need to stop crawling on the ground eating the dust of fleeting pleasures and start flying with the wind of God's eternal pleasure under my wings. (Yeah, a little corny, but its the best I've got at the moment.)

The way I spent my Friday

I don't have a lot to post about but I felt like posting anyway, so here it goes.

I just finished playing a softball game for a city rec league. My church has a team and Tim and I play on it. Today we lost. And we won. No, we didn't play a double-header. Just one game. So how does this happen without going into the complex physics of the time-space continuum? I just realized, this would actually make a pretty good riddle. I'll give the answer at the end of this post. If you want, try and figure it out before then. If you do, let me know.

I bought a few cds today. All very different. I bought the soundtrack to Pride and Prejudice because it is simply some of the most beautiful piano and orchestral music I have ever heard (albeit I never was exposed to very much of it). Even if you didn't like the movie, you had to love the score. I also bought the new Dashboard Confessional cd. It's ok. The first few songs are pretty good. The lyrics are probably the worst I've heard from them over the years. There are a couple of songs that are pretty bad. So, if you like their current radio song and don't mind skipping a few songs (or can tune out the lyrics) then I would tentatively recommend it if you have money that's just burning a hole in your pocket and you really need to get rid of it. I give it a generous 2 stars out of 5. Finally, I bought the new Johnny Cash cd "American V". Excellent cd so far. I've listened to a little more than half of it and a bunch of the songs are very explicitly about God and our need for Him. His single "God will cut you down" is a really good song in both lyrics and sound. There are also some songs that will make you feel a little sad, maybe tear up a little. Really good cd so far. Until I hear the rest I give the first 2/3's 4 out of 5.

Ok, I have something to add to a newly created list of mine. The list is "Things that I now like that I never thought I would." One addition is lettuce on hamburgers. I have never liked it in the past, but now I kind of do. A little strange, but true. My newest addition is Jeremy Camp. I got his latest cd "Restored" because I knew that I liked the few songs I had heard. As it turns out, I love the cd. Lyrically it is really good and, even though it is relative, I really connect with the songs a lot. They really speak to my struggles and put them in a godly perspective. I never thought I would like Jeremy Camp. I guess that means that I am now only one step away from liking modern country. I can't believe I am saying that, but it is true. I no longer have the same distaste that I used to have for country, and can even enjoy watching parts of their awards ceremonies on tv. I guess the last step I have to take is to just suck it up and buy a cd. I just don't know if I am ready to take that step.

Ok, the moment you have all been waiting for. The answer to the above riddle is:

We were scheduled to play a game against one team but that team didn't show up so we won by forfeit. Then we played a scrimmage game against a team that also didn't have an opponent and had won by forfeit. In that game we lost. So we both won and lost. Although the win is the only thing that counted.

God bless and good night.

Paid Time Off

I've decided that paid time off is awesome. I took my first day off today and was actually paid for it! Right now I'm trying to come up with some joke about how amazing paid time off is but I'm really not that funny and nothing's coming to me so I think that I will just leave that alone. I haven't really done anything much today. So far I've read a couple of blogs (Lauren's and Micah's [not Krishnan for you Utahns]) and a couple of articles recommended by them (both of which were very good). I got my 2 volume set of The Works of Jonathan Edwards in today! "Lucky! Have you taken it off any sweet jumps?" Not yet, but I'm hoping to later today (I told you I'm not funny). I think I'll start with The Freedom of the Will. I've wanted to read it for awhile now but I haven't had the will. Haha...ha...hmmm. This is starting to get bad.

And then I watched Elizabethtown with my mom while we had lunch. Pretty good movie. I liked the story and the soundtrack was really good. I'm tempted to go out and buy it. I have to say that both Kirsten Dunst and Orlando Bloom aren't the best actors (albeit Orlando Bloom isn't that bad), but as long as they stay beautiful I don't think they'll be hurting for work.

My plans for the rest of the day: study some Greek, do some reading, and clean out my car, which needs it badly.

I do have a couple prayer requests also:

1. My dad went to the hospital yesterday. He's had really bad back pain over the last couple days that even made it hard for him to get to sleep. The doctor said that he has an arthritic lower back that flared up into back spasms. And if you know my dad you know that he runs a lot to keep his diabetes under control. So he is going to have to make some significant changes to his routine, which is especially hard for him. So keep him in prayer and pray that through all of this he will learn to depend on God even more than he already does and that he will long all the more for his true home in heaven. God's strength is made perfect through our weaknesses.

2. Pray for my witness at work. It seems that the more areas of your life that you try to submit to God, the more he provides opportunities to show His love and grace to those around you. Every week I have multiple opportunities to share at least a little bit of the gospel with the people around me. Pray that I wouldn't be ashamed of the gospel, but will speak with boldness knowing that if God is with me, then who can be against me. Jeremiah 1:17-19 is really encouraging to me in these situations: "'Now, gird up your loins and arise, and speak to them all which I command you. Do not be dismayed before them, or I will dismay you before them. Now behold, I have made you today as a fortified city and as a pillar of iron and as walls of bronze against the whole land.... They will fight against you, but they will not overcome you, for I am with you to deliver you,' declares the LORD."

3. Pray that God would grant me humility. Pride is an evil sin that seeks to replace God with ourselves and I know that I tend to be pretty weak in this area. I need to depend on God for everything and not myself. We have but one breath in our nostrils and it is entirely up to God to give us another one.

May God's abundant grace carry you through your day.

I John 3:1-3

"See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know Him. Beloved, we are God's children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when He appears we shall be like Him, because we shall see Him as He is. And everyone who thus hopes in Him purifies Himslef as He is pure."

Let us never forget the awesomeness of this love. This love washes away all of our vile, disgusting sins. This love covers us with the blood of Christ and reconciles us to the Father. This love demanded sacrifice and was manifested in the death of Christ. That is love. That God-incarnate, our precious Savior, Jesus, would die to save sinners, enemies of God, dead in our sins, to bring us into fellowship with Him. We are His children. And how comforting it is to know, like John, that "we are" His children. Nothing can separate us from His love. This love that God bestowed on us results in three things.

In the second half of verse 1, His love results in us no longer being of the world. But rather, the world now hates us (John 15) and doesn't know us for we are no longer of it. We are "sojourners and exiles" (I Pet. 2:11). We have been called out of this present darkness and we now live in the light. This is the most dramatic change that can ever take place. We went from absolute darkness, slavery to sin, to the shining light that is Christ and we are now His bondservants. The world can no longer know us and we can no longer have fellowship with it for what fellowship has light with darkness (II Cor. 6:14). Where there is light there can be no darkness.

The second thing this love accomplishes for us is that upon the return of Christ we will be like Him (vs. 2). And the reason for this likeness, is that we will see Him as He truly is, not as through a glass darkly. We shall see face to face. I may be drawing too much from this, but I think that it is interesting that these statements come in the "love chapter" (I Cor. 13) and here in this passage we have the same kind of comments linked to the greatness of the Father's love. It is His love that allows us to see Him. If He wasn't loving He wouldn't show us Himslef, but because He is, He shows us His beauty, majesty, holiness, and absolute perfection in everything. And in the end we will see Him perfectly. May we pray that this day would come quickly. Look forward with eagerness and don't fix your gaze on this world. But rejoice with Paul that to die and see Christ clearly and fully is gain and everything else is rubbish compared to knowing our Lord and Savior. His love accomplishes this.

The third thing that this love accomplishes is a hope that changes us. His love puts in us a hope fixed on His second coming. And this hope causes us to purify ourselves as He is pure and walk like He walked (2:6). Don't live for this world. Don't fix your hope here. Fix it on the sure return of the King. He is coming again as a King and Judge and will establish His kingdom. This is our home. This world is not. Never fix your gaze here. Rather fix your gaze on the beauty of the Lord and seek to know Him more (Ps. 27:4). And if we do this, we will seek to make Him known. We will seek to show this awesome love to the world. "Let the nations be glad and sing for joy" (Ps. 67:4).

This is the great love of God that makes us His children. We are His. Live like it.